44

I would like to roll back the calendar so my first entry would be on January 1. It suits my sense of order. But since I am chronically late anyway, I've adopted the view that it's better to start late than never, and once again, I will start late.

This is the year that I will turn 44. It seems like a halfway point, though statistics tell me, if I am an average American woman, it is a bit past the middle. But I am optimistic and come from a line of healthy, long-lasting women. I figure it's the middle, at least, and maybe not even that. I have time. This is the year I am going to live differently. I am bored. I am without work. I need something new.

I have a tradition. At the beginning of a new year, I like to review the accomplishments and experiences of the past year. It's always surprising; I forget how much has happened and how much I have done. That's where I'm going to start. That's Step One.

Accomplishments of 2008:
Earned a real estate license
Tried to be a real estate agent.
Learned that I really don't like to be a real estate agent.
Moved houses. Twice.
Rented the other house.
Took a Photography class.
Took a Portrait Photography class.
Learned that I love Portrait Photography.
Took portraits.
Took a Writer's Workshop.
Wrote.
Made new friends with writers.
Sold an article to a blog.
Moved Spar to a new boarding barn.
Riding with a new trainer. Weekly lessons. I am learning a lot.
Scored 60s in Training Level. Much better.
Took a Fear of Flying course.
Flew to California. Flew home.
Conspired with hubby to buy a new bike, with an uber cushy back seat for me.
Took a bike trip to central Washington.
Took a bike trip to the coast, and stayed in Pete's amazing guest house.
Lost 14 pounds.
Cultivated a new and different and wonderful relationship with my children, as a non-custodial parent.
Saw my daughter graduate from high school.
Tried to learn to knit. I'm going to try again.
Attended the theatre. A lot. Loved it.
I bought a "work wardrobe" for the first time in 18 years. I look pretty good.

Then I like to make a list of my goals and dreams for the new year, and beyond. It's not quite like making resolutions; it feels more forgiving, more nurturing, more inspiring. It's a place to let myself be brave and imagine the possibilities, because I cannot fail; it seems like resolutions are more of a place where people set themselves up to fail.

Earn my first level scores for my Bronze Medal.
Fly. Comfortably.
Follow The Compact. I will buy nothing new. This year I will not be a member of America's patriotic consumer machine.
Run 1 mile.
Hike 6 miles.
Trail ride with Spar.
Plant a garden.
Take portraits. Take more portraits.
Write.
Collect a paycheck. Make a living with my art and my words.
Spend more time with friends.
Continue my education.
Fully fund my retirement account.

For starters. I will live by The Compact for the year 2009. I have been intrigued by this idea for years, but I have always told myself, "That's something I should start on January 1." But then I don't remember it on January 1, and when I remember it in the middle of the year, I think "Oops, I'll do it next year!" And I forget again. This year I remembered, so I feel like I'm sort of on the hook for it. So here I am. I bought a new shirt on January 2, at First Friday. I almost told myself I blew it so I can't do it this year, but then I thought, Huh? Just because you blow it before you even know you're doing it, you quit? No way. So I am beginning. It's difficult already. I want some storage drawers for my sewing room, and I saw some at Office Depot that would be perfect, and they weren't even very expensive. But they are NEW. At a STORE. No go. I'll have to look on craigslist.